Houston Rockets

James Harden has his jersey retired, except at a strip club

Isn’t it a little early in James Harden’s career for him to have a jersey retirement ceremony? No. You don’t know him. He’s done great things.

James Harden has a beard. He has Chris Paul, a beard, the biggest contract extension in NBA history, and a really good beard. It would be safe to say that he has it all.

What do you get a man who has everything? Gift certificates to TGIFridays? Maybe a leather backpack with his initials stitched on the interior for no particular reason? How about Peggle Nights for PC and XBox? All of these are good options, but none are particularly remarkable. You must try harder.

Well, Houston is affectionately known as The City That Sometimes Gives More Than Requisite Effort. “I’m going to a little harder than I need to every once in a while,” is what they say. In keeping with tradition, one de-dressing establishment in Houston went the extra few hundred yards because a mile is really far especially in this weather. They took James Harden’s jersey and put it in the rafters.

Allegedly. I’m saying allegedly. I’ve yet to convince superiors of the necessary stipend to do any empirical on-location reporting. But someone who would know better than me says this is the case on a podcast:

There is no mention of whether the jersey will be displayed next to J.R. Smith’s or Kevin Nash’s character from Magic Mike, but that’s the picture in my head. It’s a nice picture, and I don’t like to let reality get in the way of my dreams.

There is irony in an establishment that makes its money on the removal of clothing choosing to display some as a sign of honor, but irony is overrated. I recommend against it.

Retirements are usually a sign that someone’s career somewhere is over, but whether this means Harden is leaving Houston is unclear. We’ll keep an eye on it.

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